My cup was not empty, it was in the cabinet behind the Goofy mug…

Commit everything you do to the Lord. Trust Him, and He will help you. Psalms 37:5 (NLT)

Yesterday my cup was empty. Not runneth over with gratitude, not half full of hope. Nope. Empty. So empty in fact, it had been ran through the dishwasher and put back in the cabinet. I was tired. The kids had me up Tuesday night at 9:30, 10:30, midnight, 2:00AM, 3:30AM and 4:30AM which was the last and final straw for me so I got up and took a shower to start my day. All day long I lagged behind, couldn’t really follow or form a thought and all I could think about was either taking a nap in the “pump” room at work or taking a nap when I got home. Sleep was so much more valuable to me yesterday than even food. Transparent moment: I grumped. I blamed. I was mad. I grumped.

  

 I blamed my kids for the reason I was tired, I even tried to be mad at my husband who slept peacefully beside me while I was managing a wandering toddler at 3:30AM and another kid needing a boob at 4:30AM (oh, if only men could breastfeed…). Sigh. The reality is my husband won’t allow me to be mad at him because he knows how I am. He didn’t sign on (i.e.: marry me) knowing that at some point in his future I would not be a mommy mental case due to the stress of my own children. Those little suckers freak me out and they are mine. Could be the reason he constructed my home with walk in closest in ALL the bedrooms in the event I need a good place to hide.

  

In the midst of my grumps and my pouts and my need for a nap (all before 5AM), I remembered Lysa TerKeurst’s Unglued* book I’m reading. I am 64% through the book (Kindle Fire progress %) and to be honest, Lysa gets ripped off a lot. Not a judgment, not saying she is a theft magnet but she shares 2 points in the book (up to my 64%, remember) specifically where her computer and some very sentimental pieces of jewelry get stolen and how she coped with the loss. Gratitude list. Yep. Not searching the Internet for security companies or Ninja lessons but reflecting on all the reasons in life to be grateful. Sitting down in the midst of the loss to reflect on finding everything. She prays through a list of things in her mind she is grateful for until the gratitude has the energy to lift her from her seat to carry on with her day.

 

 So I did that. Instead of fuming (semi-fuming) in my bathroom for being tired I ran down the list:

Lord I am grateful to have 2 kids to wake me up.

I am grateful for a husband sleeping beside me.

I am grateful for a bed to sleep in.

I am grateful for a job to get up for.

I am grateful for my home.

Lord I’m grateful you listen to me.

 
The funny thing was after I said these things and a host of a lot of other little things (tooth paste, running water, etc.) I didn’t fume anymore. The tired was still there but the desire to blame everyone else was not. Yes, I did have my moments throughout the day of feeling tired but the rest I received in the Lord that night was amazing. My 5 month old slept from 7PM to 4AM (again, if I haven’t said it loud enough, thank You Jesus!), my son stayed in his bed all night and I woke up feeling refreshed and renewed. Not only did I feel refreshed but I willingly got in the shower at 4:20, dressed, packed kids for daycare, lunches, milk bag, pump, dropped husband off for a 7am meeting, successfully took 2 kids to daycare (by myself!) and got in a last minute nursing session before having to be at the office. Take it easy on pillar construction though. I'm not gloating or bragging but grateful. Today turned out to be a great, rewarding and restful day but tomorrow could be a train wreck all over again. I can only be grateful for today because today is all I've got.  

 

I cannot tell you how movable this book is in a life like mine. My faith has claw marks from trying to hold on and Lysa’s wisdom in her book comforts me where I am and not where I'm trying so hard to be. Reflecting on God’s truth while disciplining a 3 year old made in my image (with my short attention span, sassiness and lack of patience, my mini me), balancing baby girl, being a good wife, a housewife (of which I do not have a reality show nor am I cut from the Stepford cloth), being a “work” wife all while desiring to sit at the feet of Jesus and be still. Unglued sings to a heart like mine that there will be chaos, but through God’s Grace there will be peace.  

*Lysa TerKeurst is the author of many books including Unglued: Making Wise Choices in the Midst of Raw Emotions (published 2012) Zonderzan

HTC with a side of NIV please...

In my last post I was all excited it was Friday and hoping to get something creative created for the weekend while shamelessly plugging pictures of my kiddo rolling over (which she has taken to a professional level now, thanks). Yes, I did make something that I'm not willing to post pictures of just yet because I'm still working out the details (the handles, grrrrr) but its a work in progress. Being a work in progress leads me to my next adventure (I said very early on it a post here and on my SSDesigns page, I have a really short attention span so I go on A LOT of adventures, stay with me).

 

A couple weeks ago a friend sent me one of those chain emails "forward if you love Jesus, don't forward if you don't" type emails. I will be honest, yes, I love Jesus a lot but I'm not one to forward those emails unless they really have a faith directed message. Sorry chain originators and senders. This specific email compared how much we text, play with, play on and carry our cell phones and what would it look like if we took God's Word everywhere we took our cell phones. So, last Friday (not the yippie Friday but a week later) I started packing around my Word. I have a big NLT bible that has been my new drug of choice (yes I said drug) because I like the writing style but I've always been an NIV girl. I also have a pocket sized NIV version that I carry in my purse (so I guess that makes it purse size...).

 

I make it a point that where the phone goes, the Word goes. At first, lets be honest, I was nervous. Here I am packing around a bible and I feel like people are going to look at me like where is my soap box with all my political stickers attached to stand on. No, this is not the case. This adventure is just for me. I'm terrible with my "smart phone". I do take it everywhere. I play games, I check emails, I text (oh goodness do I ever text), I check news which is odd because I really don't like watching the news, I take pictures of moments with my kids when while taking the picture I miss the actual moment with my kids then I tell them to hold on (try that with a 5 month old) while I shamelessly post the moment to my social network and then text it to all their grandparents. I'm not as bad as most but I'm just missing out on things I should see while walking with my head up and not down giving myself carpel tunnel syndrome.

 

Enough. I decided to carry my Word to see if instead of responding with a snarky "I told you so" text to a friend I reach to God's Word for direction and guidance. Instead of taking my phone to the "pump" room at work I take my Word too and then see which one I use. It has only been a few days into this journey (6 to be exact) and some days are harder than others (because I'm making some dietary changes while on this 30 day journey, hangry and caffeine deprived) but I can tell you that at the end of this 30 day journey I will be forever changed. It will be and has been tough but I'm up for wherever God takes me. I'm journal-ing as well to track all the ways I'm changing on this journey. I'll keep you posted! Probably with some more shameless pictures of my children too but timing of taking those pictures will be better planned, promise!

Its Friday!

Woo hoo! Its Friday! I am so grateful its Friday! End of a work week and beginning of a creative week! Yippie! Well, technically all that excitement translates into getting the house cleaned, laundry done, chase the kids, try new foods, take a bath (Mommy...), visit family, find time for friends and some how some way find time in the midst of the Mommy Demands to be creative. Pinned some good stuff today (Michael Miller, Riley Blake and Amy Butler to name a few... makes me drool) so I hope to try to at least make a pillow this weekend! Trying to jazz up the house now that we are contemplating selling it. Need to add some color in the rooms we have returned to "Soft Cloud" (by Porter Paint) which is a polite way of saying white but not white white. Wish me luck.

 

By the way, not meaning to brag but this is what someone else has been doing this week...

 

 Thinking about it..

.

 Finding my focal point...

 

Tuck legs to the chest...

 

 

 Gravity...

 

 

Almost there...

 

 

Rub boogers on my blankie...

 

Tada!

 

This is what we like to call taking a Little Mommy Brag Break brought to you in part by all the moments that make us go awwwwww. 

30 days of what....

Yes, I have an incredibly short attention span. Its genetic (FYI, always blame your parents...) so I have to embrace my flaws (and blame my parents). So, I haven't exactly started off my month of "Pinning" with a bang. A failed attempt at making my own babies wipes was the best I could do first week of September.

 

Having 2 kids now basically means take all your extra money and toss it in the toilet then flush. Might have to give a courtesy flush to make sure all the extra money has successfully been sucked away. OK, back on track, what I'm getting to is the fact that now there are 2 kids I have to be creative when it comes to gifting.I haven't exactly been keeping up with fulfilling all the great ideas pinned politely on my work computer but this past weekend I really found a winner. 

 

Someone pinned http://glitteradventure.blogspot.com/2006/11/exploding-box-class.html which the writer calls "Exploding Box Class". Looked cute. The writer basically takes some scrapbook paper, card stock and pictures to create a little "picture book" in a box. I can totally do scrap booking so this was my chance for redemption in failing at the first 8 days of September! The writer not only writes great step by step directions (attention span issues, remember) but your finished project looks just like how she explained. I love these little boxes. I wish I could have kept one but I made them for my son's teachers so I had to give them away. I highly recommend pinning and trying the tutorial from Glitter Adventure!

I titled my boxes "Follow Me from 2 to 3"

 

Take the lid off and they just pop open.

 

They turned out so cute!

 

And the award for most theatrical performance in parenting goes to...

OK, so as I re-read my last post about my son not being potty trained I am sooooooo grateful that I'm having a way better week. That Friday, I took off work to stay home staring at my 3 year old while he either peed on the floor or peed on me. Luckily, my little man being the rockstar that he is mastered the potty by Saturday night and Mommy was able to burn her "buff" and retire from Survivor island. Lets face it, spending much of your day racing to the bathroom with a kiddo who is trying to learn when to tell you he has to go affords you the opportunity of being peed on for much of the day. Just wanted to share that yes, I am still auditioning for lead actress in a dramatic series so keep in touch but that my son is now potty trained!